Unreturned love

Posted in

I blog a lot about love. Love “makes the world go around,” right? Theologically, many believe that it is the primary attribute of God. Love is the “sriracha” sauce of healthy relationships. Hopefully, the love you demonstrate is reciprocal. But what if your love isn’t returned? When a parent ignores their own children. When a relative totally pays no attention to you. Or maybe your marriage is largely one-sided.

You may find yourself in a situation like one of these. Making matters worse, it’s especially difficult when you feel like you’ve done the right things. For example, you’ve tried talking with them. You show respect. You carve out time for the other person. You put down your phone and show attentiveness. You support them during stressful times. But in spite of your best efforts, you’re marginalized, neglected, and ignored.

The best counsel for me rests in these areas.  1) Stay connected to them. It could be that they are dealing with other issues that have nothing to do with you at all.  2) Resist disparaging them even when you’re “justifiably” angry. 3) Seek mentorship from someone wise that you respect. They might help you discover things that will benefit you.  4)  Find comfort in the character and love of God. The Bible says, “He will never leave you or forsake you.”  The Message paraphrase of Psalm 68:5-6 says  “Father of orphans, champion of widows, is God in his holy house. God makes homes for the homeless, leads prisoners to freedom,”

Worried about your pastor? Take the first step today.