Some Lessons We've Learned

Over the last 40 years of ministry

Learned helplessness

By boblehman / May 23, 2023

Helplessness has a few sides to it. There is a “cuteness” to it. We’ll say things like, “Oh look at that poor dog, he looks so helpless.” In those situations, you’re almost compelled to act to help out. There is the side of economic and social loss where someone loses their ability to survive and…

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Wait for the marshmallow

By boblehman / May 16, 2023

When I was a kid, I would have loved participating in a chocolate cake-eating experiment, but there was no such thing. Believe me, I would have found it. However, there actually was a famous marshmallow-eating experiment conducted at Stanford University. Children were tested to see if they could resist eating a marshmallow. If they could…

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Find the surprise

By boblehman / May 9, 2023

Things that surprise us are easier to remember.  I was in high school at a Sadie Hawkins dance. Afterward, I took my date for a drive in my Mom’s car. When we stopped, we were leaning against the car. We both commented about how quiet the desert was that night. All of a sudden, above…

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A friend of mine died today

By boblehman / May 2, 2023

A friend of mine died today. He was working on his roof and fell. It looked bad from the beginning, but he got better and better. But in the middle of his first day of rehabilitation, his heart stopped. His family was devastated. So was I. What do you say to his wife, the love…

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Friendship worth pursuing

By boblehman / April 25, 2023

Friendship…how important is it? Does it fall into the “extra” category. Is it something like, “it’s nice when it happens, but it shouldn’t necessarily be pursued.” Or is it something that has profound implications for our lives? I believe it is the latter. Proverbs 13:20 says “Walk with the wise and become wise. For a companion of fools…

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When you’re sick

By boblehman / April 18, 2023

I’m not feeling very good today. It’s just a cold. No big deal, but when you’re home and out of your regular routine it can be frustrating. There are so many things you’d like to do but you just don’t have the motivation.  So what do you do? First, because of the recent pandemic, it’s…

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What do I need to focus on?

By boblehman / April 11, 2023

With every “smartphone” update, there are new features to try out. My latest update features a way to “focus” your attention on a specific project without distractions. This is really helpful for me given my propensity to wander. But, it reminded me of the importance of figuring out “what do I need to focus on?”…

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Try try again

By boblehman / April 4, 2023

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a hundred times, right? It probably was an encouragement to you when you were in grade school, but how about now? That phrase really doesn’t motivate me much. I’m guessing the same is true for you. But what…

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I’m especially fond of you!

By boblehman / March 28, 2023

“I’m especially fond of you.” That’s a quote from the 2007 novel “The Shack” by William P. Young. The main character is Mackenzie Phillips and four years prior to the setting of the book, one of his children is abducted and killed while on a family camping trip. It turned him bitter at life and…

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A day wasted?

By boblehman / March 21, 2023

In the Diary of Brooks Adams is an entry about a special day when he was eight years old. He wrote, “Went fishing with my father; the most glorious day of my life,” and through the next 40 years there were constant references to that day and the influence it had on his life. Brooks’…

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The “journey” in journeyman

By boblehman / March 14, 2023

How do you love people in need? Whether you grew up going to Sunday School or not, you probably have heard of the phrase, “The Good Samaritan”. It refers to a parable told by Jesus Christ. The point of His story is a foundational example of what it means to be a Christ-follower. Passing on…

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Visa and answered prayer

By boblehman / March 7, 2023

Before entering many countries, you must have a visa.  A visa allows a foreign citizen to travel to the port of entry and authorizes the immigration inspector to grant admission into the country. An accurate visa is a pretty big deal, right? Well, on a recent trip to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, guess who put the wrong…

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Never give up!

By boblehman / February 28, 2023

Winston Churchill’s first words as Prime Minister to the House of Commons on May 13, 1041, were, “I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears, and sweat.”  It’s interesting to note that Churchill was unpopular with many Conservatives and probably most of the Labour Party. But, in the midst of war with Germany, he…

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Sweeping dirt

By boblehman / February 21, 2023

I recently went to Cairo, Egypt. What a captivating city, rich with history and culture. The Egyptians are a proud people with a fascinating culture. While waiting in a car adjacent to a very busy street, I noticed an older man. He was in the middle of traffic sweeping the dirt from the highway into…

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Follow the blueprint

By boblehman / February 14, 2023

What do you do when things don’t turn out the way you planned? You didn’t get the raise. The promotion went to someone else. You received a surprisingly low grade. You’re team lost. You get the picture. We’ve all been there and some of you are there right now. You’re trying your best to process…

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Want to improve your leadership?

By boblehman / February 7, 2023

Most of my real estate friends would agree with this statement: “The three most important words in real estate are – location, location, location.” To be sure, location is huge in both residential and commercial sales. That being said, “What might be the three most important words in developing and growing in leadership?” Most experts…

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Three Important Things

By boblehman / January 31, 2023

What are the 3 most important things a parent can teach a child? According to a New York Post survey published December 16, 2018, they are, “Be respectful,” “be thankful for what you have” and “honesty is the best policy.”  That’s not a bad list. Seems that if we got these three right, we’d have…

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Reflection time

By boblehman / January 24, 2023

I just returned from attending the funeral of a friend. He was a courageous Christian friend who, because of his faith in Christ, I will see again one day in heaven. He pastored in an inner-city church. I listened to some incredible stories, many of them I heard personally from my friend. He never passed…

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Talk is cheap

By boblehman / January 17, 2023

How do you show your love for somebody? That’s a fair question. Now I’m not just talking about your boyfriend or girlfriend per se. In fact, let me rephrase the question. How do you show your love to anybody? As I ponder the question, there are several things that come to mind. It’s not just…

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Get activated!

By boblehman / January 10, 2023

I received an updated credit card this past week. It came with a sticker attached that read, “THIS CARD CAN NOT BE USED UNTIL ACTIVATED.” I’m certain you’ve had cards with similar instructions. My wife smiled and said this is not a bad warning label for Christ-followers. She’s right. There is a decision of dedication…

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With words, leaders lead

By boblehman / January 3, 2023

I attended a Bible study with CEO’s and other leaders from the Phoenix area. The theme of the study was this: “Words are the most powerful tool of leadership.” That thought has stayed with me. With words, armies march. With words, peace starts. With words, love begins. With words, relationships end. And with words, leaders…

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Avoiding the wrong things

By boblehman / December 27, 2022

Leadership understandably means doing the right things and making the right decisions. But have you considered that equally important is making sure you don’t do the wrong things? These may be obvious, but here are two for a punchout list for you to consider. Don’t take credit for someone else’s work or accomplishments. I happened…

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Christmas in nine words

By boblehman / December 20, 2022

What’s your favorite Christmas verse in the Bible? Isaiah 7:14? “Therefore the Lord Himself will give you a sign. Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a Son, and shall call His name Immanuel.” Matthew 1:21? “Therefore the Lord Himself will give you a sign. Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a Son, and…

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Your life as a headline

By boblehman / December 13, 2022

Much of the history you read is in summary form. “Washington crosses the Potomac.” “Japan surrenders ending World War II.” “Elon Musk set to buy Twitter.” But history books don’t have the bandwidth to tell every back story or every detail that led to the headline. I get the same sense when reading what the…

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Purpose in the pain

By boblehman / December 6, 2022

Sometimes life is just plain hard. People we love get sick. Governments do idiotic things. The news we hear is often negative. Careers don’t always work out. Kids don’t constantly express their love for their parents. Has it ever crossed your mind, “why?” Here’s a thought. Crisis and difficulty in your life have a purpose.…

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Doing “random”

By boblehman / November 29, 2022

I have a friend visiting this week. When dinnertime arrived, I asked, “Where do you want to go?” She said, “Let’s do random.” That’s a code word for “Let’s not plan, let’s just go.” There was a palatable feeling of disorder that washed over me. Now, those that know me, know that I’m not the…

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After you’ve done everything, what do you do?

By boblehman / November 22, 2022

Some people are just contrary, stubborn, and mean. You could stand on your head all day trying to resolve an issue and it wouldn’t work. Because they’re not willing. Maybe they don’t care. Maybe they don’t see their error. Maybe they refuse to admit something. But ultimately, it’s on them. You’ve tried. You’ve prayed. But…

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Sign language

By boblehman / November 15, 2022

Nothing too profound today, but I write this blog today at an outdoor coffee shop. Lots of people deep in conversations. But one girl at a table got my attention. She was making a ZOOM call on her computer. The interesting thing was she was deaf and she was not talking but using sign language.…

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When character is lost

By boblehman / November 8, 2022

Billy Graham said many profound things, but among them was this statement, “When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost, something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost.”   Why is it that character plays such a huge part in leadership? Character is fundamental to effective leadership because good character builds…

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Lead like a shepherd

By boblehman / November 1, 2022

What happens when leaders don’t lead well? It’s a great question. You can see it all over the place. It doesn’t take great insight to see the results.  Usually, there is a lack of direction, decisions are delayed or avoided, there is little or no motivation for anyone looking to them. It’s been said, “Everything…

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Helpful Links

Soul Shepherding

When you are busy with your work, family, or ministry it can be hard to fit in caring for your own soul. This can lead to burnout or becoming spiritually stagnant. That doesn’t have to be your story. Soul Shepherding offers resources and training for you and the people you influence to thrive with Jesus. Founders Bill and Kristi Gaultiere are Doctors of Psychology and Spiritual Directors who have developed a distinctive approach to intimacy with Jesus, personal wholeness, and fruitful ministry which they teach in their Institute.
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Beggar’s Daughter

: A ministry dedicated to walking with women who have an addiction to pornography.
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XXXchurch, the largest site online and the most recognized voice on the planet on the issue of pornography, is your resource online to fight porn addiction. XXXchurch uses the web, social media and news media to tell a story often left untold and is committed to help men and women conquer sexual issues like pornography addiction and sex addiction and regain control of their lives.
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Net Nanny

Net Nanny protects families and helps them manage their experiences with digital content. Parents, spouses, guardians, and educators are given visibility and control in managing a child’s online experience.
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Enough is Enough

Enough Is Enough®; (EIE), a non-partisan, 501(c)(3) non-profit organization, emerged in 1994 as the national leader on the front lines to make the Internet safer for children and families. Since then, EIE has pioneered efforts to confront online pornography, child pornography, child stalking, sexual predation, and other forms of online victimization. By leveraging its expertise, growing national partnership network, and positive reputation among the public, media, law enforcement, and Internet industry, EIE continues to advance innovative initiatives and effective communication strategies to protect children online.
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Every Man Ministries

With a mission to create a movement of God’s men who are empowered to lead others on a meaningful journey into personal character and leadership, ultimately having a positive impact on generations of women, children and families.
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New Life Spirit Recovery

To educate, equip, treat and deliver Christ-centered solution to struggling addicts and alcoholics and their family members. To take our message and testimony of freedom from addiction through Jesus Christ to the community, church and beyond.
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Freedom in Christ Ministries

The mission of FICM-USA is to resource and equip Christians in America to experience spiritual freedom and spread that freedom to others.
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Helping people by providing practical tools and ongoing training for more effective living.
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PornProof Kids

This internet ministry is the work of Kristen Jenson, mother of three children. Her desire is to help parents inoculate their young children against the destructive and potentially addictive dangers of internet pornography. How? By making it OK to talk about pornography and explaining a little brain science in the process.
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